A Sign

I went to cheat and have a cigarette AND some pizza today, and this is what happened:

I lit the wrong end of the cigarette and choked and burned my finger. (For any of you who have done this know how toxic and disgusting this is.)

I went to take a big bite of pizza and all the toppings slid off onto my shirt.

If that isn't a sign, I don't know what is.

Just another little tidbit for you. I somehow channel surfed onto Fear Factor last night, which I never watch. (I hate reality shows, and the like.) They had 2 girls and 2 guys putting COW EYEBALLS in their mouth without hands, then popping the juice out of them into a glass until filled to a certain level, then DRINKING the eyeball juice. OK, YUCK. Who in the hell wants to watch that? They were only getting 50 thousand bucks, and that is only if they win! I wouldn't do that for a million! I like the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, yes, but that is NOT REAL. I was so grossed out that I thought I was gonna barf up my chili. Those are some seriously macho women, I tell ya. I thought I was tough because I can lift more weight than most of the guys in the gym and I've jumped out of an airplane, but if I had to go anywhere near my mouth with cow eyeballs, suddenly all my tough-girlness would vanish into a sea of barf, and then I would probably do the "Oh, ick!" dance and spend an hour drinking and gargling mouthwash. I've even seen dead bodies when I interned for the police department. I handled THAT.