Hormones

I am feeling lazy today, coming down off of the holidays. I also have a sty in my eye. Those hurt! I also keep having acne breakouts right around my cycle. I have to go talk to my OB about my hormones, because something is up. Aren't you glad you read my blog? LOL. I can't help it; I can talk about most anything without getting embarrassed. I only talk about myself, though, I would never want to violate anyone else's privacy. Some people love it, some people hate it, but this is me. Take it or leave it. You must be OK with it; you're still reading my blog! Wait, don't go!

I am in a baking mood. I'm going to make a pumpkin loaf, I think. I have a great recipe. I'll take a pic for you. Per usual. There, is that better? No one is offended by pumpkin loaf, right?

Trainwreck

Today. What am I doing today? Well, I woke up to RAIN, glorious RAIN. Never thought I would say that! It is going to be a flood, but I've had enough snow. I have to do some work from home, and I have to go buy a new wallet. Yesterday, while out shopping, I opened the zipper compartment of change, and the zipper just kept coming right off, along with flying coins all over the place. It was fun. I always draw attention to myself (not meaning to) when I'm out. I'm a trainwreck.

Anyway, I just ordered a black bra online (you really wanted to know that I'm sure) and now I'm blogging because I realized it was noon already and I hadn't said anything yet. The shame! I didn't wake up until 10:30, so sue me. I just couldn't get out of bed. Blah. My phone is ringing, gotta go.

OMG I just realized how awful that bath robe picture of me is! Yikes.

Clearance

I love the word "clearance". I just got THE coziest, comfiest robe in the WORLD. It's one of those hotel robes. For cheap! Now my home spa just needs one of those Swiss showers with jets all over the walls shooting at you from every direction and then the big sunflower overhead nozzle that feels like rain coming down. I would never leave the shower! Too bad I can only afford clearance items. Bah.

Snowing Again

Hi! The interview didn't happen, my interviewer seems to be MIA. Did she forget? Maybe it's the weather. It's FREAKING SNOWING AGAIN. I have close to 2 feet of snow. ENOUGH ALREADY. I'm taking my mom home via a little after Christmas sale shopping. Like I need more stuff. I'm hungry so I'll blog later.

2nd Interview

Good morning, all. I have a second interview this morning with that cancer research company that I spoke with when I was in California. Wish me luck, this would be way more money. I like where I'm at now, but it makes my budget a little tight and with contracting, there are not many benefits. I haven't heard back from Tennessee yet, not expecting to until after the first of the year. I'll report back later.

Too much eating.

I am so full I am going to burst. I can't even finish my cake. I goofed and took a long nap and didn't get my prime rib in the oven until 6 pm with a two hour cook time. Oops. It's just as well, though, because I made Belgian waffles with strawberries, eggs and bacon for breakfast and the appetite didn't quite come back until late anyway. My mom, who weighs about a buck-o-five, ate as much as me who weighs a tad more. I was so glad! I need to fatten that woman up!

Despite feeling blue for the holidays, I had a very nice Christmas. The company was great, the generosity was HUGE, and I was feeling blessed. I was sad that most all the traditions I was used to had to change this year, and I was down quite a few people, but it turned out better than expected. I hope all of you had a great day, too. I received some cool new bath stuff, and I intend on pampering myself ASAP.

CrazyDogMama signing off, I have some wine to drink and some relaxing to do.

A Very Merry Christmas from CrazyDogMama & the Pups

I truly hope you all have a wonderful day. Thank you for being a part of my blog and life.

 
Love, from CrazyDogMama and the pups.

Observations

Well, I have to get some work done, then I'm going to take a nap. Drinking (much) wine and appetizers is the agenda for the evening.

Observation of the day: A front wheel drive Mercedes had his chains on the rear wheels. I guess being rich doesn't make you smart.

Double chin hider.

I have to go out in this mess. You have to have milk to make mochas. Ug.

Oh, Louie.

This is Louie's idea of peeing outside. Good grief. At least it's not on the carpet. It's snowing AGAIN. I think this will be my first white Christmas ever. Too bad I'm not 8. Well, Merry Christmas Eve. Yippee. I'm going to go eat some cake.

KFC

Here's my big rant as promised. KFC no longer sells potato salad. WTF? Fascists.

Christmas Toes

Oh my Lord what a madhouse! Leaving early was a good idea in THEORY. With the approaching storm, last minute shoppers and bad road conditions, traffic SUCKED! It took me an hour to go 5 blocks.

But I did manage to give myself a little Christmas present, a much-needed pedicure. See my Christmas toes? I know you love them. Grabbed my mom and now I'm waiting in the Costco parking lot for her so we can get some stuff. Perfect time to blog. :-) I'm sure I'll have some philosophical diatribe late this evening, I feel a rant coming on.

Incoming Storm

I get to get off early today and work from home tomorrow! There is another storm coming in tonight and they don't want me to have to deal with it or miss anymore work. My mom is coming to stay with me starting tonight, too, so that works out perfect!

I'm going to make us Christmas dinner, so leaving early today gives me time to go do the grocery shopping and not be out late. I'm making prime rib, scalloped potatoes, asparagus, salad, rolls, and chocolate cake for dessert! Of course, there will be wine and spiked eggnog as well. It will just be my mom, Jim and I, but I'm trying really hard to make it nice. We've all been through a lot, and I really want to appreciate every moment the best I can.

Purple Bathroom!

In order to keep myself busy and not sit on the pity pot of depression, I am developing a set of projects for myself that I want to get done.

Recently, the purple bathroom was accomplished, with new fixtures (except I still need a new faucet). I've wanted to do this for so long, and I finally found the perfect shade of lavender, and had the time and motivation. I now need to paint the bedroom and master bath, the laundry room, and the office. Then my house won't look so much like an apartment, and potentially will be prettier if I go to sell. I need new carpet in the worst way, but that is going to have to wait.

I also need to organize my digital pictures. That will be a job and a half. I need to give away a bunch of clothes. I need to have another garage sale. I'm tired of "stuff", I want to go minimal. Quality, not quantity. I also need to deep clean. Fun, fun, fun! The Bahamas are just going to have to wait for my next life.

What in the hell am I doing?

This is the title of my post. It should be my mantra. Have you ever thought this? This is a daily conversation I have with myself. What in the HELL am I doing?

What am I doing with my life? Where am I going? This is not even close to where I thought I'd be at 37. Not that I thought I was going to be a rockstar or anything, but usually people have SOMETHING figured out by now. Not me. It's not a midlife crisis, I don't need to relive my youth, I'm GLAD to be done with that. I've definitely gained some life wisdom, but I'm stuck. What now? I still need to move, not run, just move. I still have unfinished business. Sometimes I do the dumbest things and say the dumbest things. I also TYPE the dumbest things. But that's OK. Live and learn. You want to know something weird? I was in a pretty good mood today, then I went to bed and got all teary. The joys of being a woman, I guess. I got up because I thought it was ridiculous to be feeling and acting this way, and now I'm writing, because that's what I do when I'm restless and twitchy. I write. It's my therapy, and my outlet. The movie I just saw had a line in it that really got to me. It is what turned on the waterworks. A female in the movie said, "My life has been unremarkable in every way." I feel like that sometimes. Life is not about money or success or things or fame, but people. It's about people. I wonder if I have had an impact on anyone, ever. I'm sure I probably have, but it still makes me wonder. Have I been too selfish? Have I been too self-involved to see others? I reach out a lot, but usually manage to push everything and everyone farther away. That's probably why I like dogs. Crap, I don't even know where this post is going! I'm just blindly writing and letting whatever is in there, come out. That is the beauty of writing for me, to just spill out what is on the inside and try to make sense of it. I never really expected anyone to read it. Maybe no one is. Why is contentment and/or happiness so elusive? It's not like I'm the only one who struggles with this. In fact, I believe the majority of people are either in this same place right now or have been at some point in their lives. If I could just get a handle on a direction, then maybe I could get focused. I don't know. Someday this dark cloud will dissipate, but for now, I have questions.

Are you content? Is this all there is? What in the hell am I doing?

I had to go to work.

Well thank you for all the compliments today, I'm touched! You guys know how much I love comments anyway. It's what makes it all worth it.

I'm mostly goofing off (as you can see), trying to get SOME work done. No one hardly is here, and I have questions. Usually, I don't have to worry about going to work when it snows, because I can take paid time off, or work from home. But with a new contract job, that's not happening. So here I am! Got my snow boots on and everything.

I can't believe Christmas is Thursday, it just doesn't FEEL like Christmas. Things are just so weird anymore in my life. I don't recognize anything. I still have my sense of humor, though.

BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. Whine, complain.

Winter Wonderland & Cozy Attire

Pictures galore! I wore my purple fuzzy scarf today since I blubbered into my other one on Friday. I'm feminine from the waste up and bulky commando boot attire from the waist down. LOL. I just had a nice TREACHEROUS 2-hour commute, and I never saw pavement. I heard on the radio that the weather here hasn't been this bad since 1968. Neat! And it isn't finished yet, or so they say.

Despite snow walls, compact snow and ice and being broke, I'm actually in a good mood today! (Don't fall over.) I'm glad to be among the living. I could only find one open coffee stand (pictured) and got winked at by a cute guy! A good way for any girl to start her day. My computer isn't working here at work, so a-blogging-I-will-do on the Crackberry for your amusement, and mine. There is no one here to fix it yet.

What do you want for Christmas?

I need a Christmas miracle. Really, what do you want? If you could have ANYTHING? Is your wish generic or specific? Is it something shiny, or something for the heart? Tell me. Pretend I'm Santa.

I'm finally going back to work. I'd never thought I would be GLAD to go back to work. It still sucks out there but cabin fever is nuts. I promise I'll blog better today, yesterday was a hard day.

Wine with a side of pasta.

I have had a really bad day. Uber crappy. Instead of getting into it, I'll show you the pasta I'm making with a large amount of red wine in it. Angry cooking is what I call it.

Soul on Fire