My Epidural Steroid Injection

OK, epidural over with. If anyone tells you it is no big deal to get an epi injection for a bulging herniated disc is LYING! First of all, they put you on this ironing board (narrow) bed thing with your butt sticking up in the air, then they give you "light" sedation which doesn't do diddly squat, then they stick you in the back/butt/hip 3 times for local anesthetic which KILLS, then BOOM they cram this huge, long needle into your lower back and send you through the freaking roof!! I screamed into my pillow and bit down on my own hand to keep from punching everyone in the room. OMG it felt like the nerve in my left leg was going to explode! OUCH! Then, while writhing around in the recovery room moaning, the pain finally started to subside. The nurse said my blood pressure and heart rate were dangerously high from the pain, but the fact that I had that much of a pain reaction was a "good thing" because it means the doctor nailed the right area and my chance for success was much higher. I hope she is right, cuz I ain't doin' that again. The pain is supposed to slowly go away over the next week and the full effect of the injection should take place on the 6th or 7th day. I go back to physical therapy on Friday and if it holds, I will be back to normal in 2 to 3 weeks. Finger and toes crossed and prayers-a-plenty! Back surgery, if needed, would have a 6 week recovery and I would go crazy, so I don't want that. K is excited for me to come back and we will work up VERY slowly, concentrating on strengthening my core. I didn't gain any weight back on my hiatus, I actually lost 12 pounds, so that won't be an issue thank the LORD.

I feel pretty good tonight, my back feels "stronger", meaning I can stand up straight. Previously I would have to hunch over and then sit back down after a few minutes from my back muscles giving out. I have to take it very easy the next few days, so blah, but I'm SOOOO glad that is over with and seems to be working so far.

Dismal MRI Results. Arg.

So last Wednesday I FINALLY got the MRI, albeit an "open" MRI so that I stopped having panic attacks.  I have an appointment to see a specialist tomorrow morning and my doctor STILL hasn't returned any of my phone calls asking for the results. I called maybe 20 times. I think the receptionist wants to kick me in my female parts. I have to go in tomorrow with XRAY and MRI stuff in my hands, so I had also called the diagnostic place and put in an order for the CDs. Because my doc didn't call with a summary and tell me what is wrong with me in ENGLISH, I had to read the report myself. Yeah, so it says "Blah blah blah, bulging blah blah severe, blah blah L4, L5 and S1 with mild to moderate blah. I *think* I have deciphered it to mean I have a herniated disc or two with some arthritis. Not good, the report was scary.  So, I will have to find out the details tomorrow.  I think everyone has it out for me to just continue to be in massive pain.  Good times.

Iced Coffee is my Life

There is a blogger out there who UNDERSTANDS. I love coffee; all kinds of coffee but iced is by FAR my favorite and the one kind I cannot live without. Here is a post that describes how to make the perfect iced coffee at home, and I know now that my life is complete. I will cold brew espresso of course, but I'm sure everyone has their preferences. It is a lot of work, but sooooo worth it. I could not handle a commute to work without it.

http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2011/06/perfect-iced-coffee/

Stupid MRI Tubes

I almost did not have an MRI today. Um, that little, tiny LONG tube that they put you in headfirst on your back? Yeah, NO F'ing WAY! I tried to be tough and brave, I really did. I actually got all the way inside that thing before freaking out. I pep-talked myself that I could do this. I couldn't. My shoulders are too wide to fit in the MRI tube, so they made me raise my arms over my head. Once inside, my shoulders were pressing against the sides of the tube, and also against my ears, the top of the tube was TOUCHING MY NOSE, and my hips were squished against the sides too. I totally and completely panicked and yelled to be taken out. I was sweating and hyperventilating. Right now, just typing this, my heart is racing, and I have that punch in the pit of the stomach feeling. I apologized profusely to the tech, but I'm sorry, that was ridiculously crazy! He was really nice and said most people can't do it and that it was totally fine. He gave me two other options (THANK GOD) of sedation or what they call an "open" MRI. I said no to sedation, what if I woke up? NOPE. So, I went with the open MRI. MUCH BETTER. They had to send me to another facility, but I'm so glad it worked out. The open MRI is like a giant hamburger bun, with the sides open. I was cool with that and actually fell asleep. Whew!! I'm going to have nightmares about that other one.

Now it's hurry up and wait. Do I have a herniated disc or what? I want to know NOW! I want it FIXED! Krzysztof says I will be back at training soon, but I'm so scared they will tell me I shouldn't train.  This whole disability thing doesn't work for me. I will find a way damnit!