What have I been up to?

I've been smashing my fucking thumb, that's what. We have these big, heavy filing cabinets at work that you have to throw your body weight into to close. When I rammed my shoulder into the top drawer like a football player practicing on those big heavy bags, I forgot the tiny detail that was my thumb in the way. OMFG. I must have jumped up and down shaking my hand like a crazy freak for 10 minutes shouting some very colorful sentences. It went something like this:

"FUCK! FUCK! FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT SON OF A MOTHERFUCKING BITCH!"

Anyway, I almost passed out because the pain was unbelievable. I fractured my wrist once and it didn't hurt this bad. Let me tell you how much you use your right thumb. A LOT. I bump it on something every 4 seconds or so and yelp like a banshee. Oh, by the way, "bump" means lightly brushing up against anything. It is all purple and black, and the picture doesn't even come close to showing the mess that is my cuticle. OUCH, people, OUCH. Do not try this at home.