Goodbyes are hard.

I have two weeks left, but everyone else had to leave today. Very sad.

Breakfast of Champions

It is an iced mocha and sausage biscuit with cheese kind of morning. I don't care about clogged arteries today. Or any other day for that matter. Fuck it, bring me cheese.

Thelma & Louise

You know what's fun to watch? Thelma and Louise. Sue me, but I love that movie.

So much to do, so little motivation.

The phone interview went well. The lady interviewing me commented that she wasn't supposed to ask me "personal questions" but wanted to ask some (fun ones), so I said, "Sure!" and we chatted and laughed for quite a while. I LIKE THAT! Jobwise they need a lot of controls established, which is my forte! I am supposed to be scheduled for a face-to-face interview in a week or two because the company is crazy-busy (good sign!), so they asked for my patience. I have none of that, but I am pleased with them so far, so OK.

I have never been so busy in all my life. Not even when I had 2 jobs and a scrapbooking business. Seriously. All I feel like I'm doing is running in circles. Phone calls, emails, paperwork, interviews, getting 3 months of work done in two weeks, computer guy coming tomorrow to get files off of my old fried laptop, taking the car in for work, training other people to do my work, buying another airline ticket to go to California to drive my mom back, going to those market research things where they pay you cash for your opinion, ordering dog food, setting up COBRA, getting blood drawn, taking dog to the vet. AAHH!

Sympathy? Anyone?

Cold Hell

This cold/flu thing I've got going on is kicking my butt. You could say I'm in "Cold" hell.  I've been upset and stressed out for so long that my poor little body just can't handle anything. I think we are designed to deal with 'spurts' of stress, not years. I went right to bed last night, no blogging, no TV, no answering the phone.

Anyway, I have another interview today and this is an important one. It is a phone interview, but I'm really interested in this job. Wish me luck.

Miserable

I finally got the cold everyone has. It's lovely. When I bend over, snot FALLS out of my nose. I'm miserable, and what terrific timing! It's fun how the older you get, the harder it is on you. I feel like I can hardly move, and everything seems surreal. Pray it goes away quick, I don't have time for this!

Interview time!

I'm sitting here in my car waiting for the longest train in the history of the world. Might as well blog.

I have an interview today. I'm all dressed up, hair in a French twist. I really hate interviews. I want to waltz in there and tell them just to save time because I can do this job in my sleep and no one else will be as accurate as my anal retentive, perfectionist ass who will make friends with everyone instead of piss off all the engineers like most people in my field do. I hate beating around the bush. Let's just get the job done. Instead, I have to be all politically correct and sell my talents gracefully. Bah!

I'm trying to pull up.

Got some interviews lined up this week. Let's see if any of them want to loosen the purse strings a bit. I'm trying to pull up. It is hard watching your world crash around you. I am just so overwhelmed I can't even think. I have 2 audits to get my company through (just found out about a surprise FDA audit next week, neat) and some of my hopeful prospects are not living up to my expectations. I just can't even GUESS what my future holds right now. I'm trying not to worry about it, but I'm not exactly a Pollyanna kind of person. I'm a bit jaded. I call it realistic. I got an email about a job in Colorado. Interesting. I'll think about it.

Down

I'm really, really down.

My Epic Halloween Party

The epic Halloween party I had!  In order, we have:  Amy & Hole (Beth), Juice (Annie), creepy bathroom, creepy food, Hole (Beth), Melissa, Michael (Jim), crackberry addicts, ping pong, creepy water cooler, and zombie Denin!

Geriatrics

Well, we had fun, I love my friends to death, especially when they are willing to drive so far out to see my craziness, but dude I feel like a geriatric. We were all yawning by 10 pm. LOL. I didn't drink very much; I'm feeling done with that too. I think this will be my last party. I do have some fun pics but I'm too tired, need bed.

CrazyDogMama the Vampire

Vamping out. A few pics of me getting ready. I need a good neck to nibble on, any volunteers?

Parties are Work

Have I mentioned how much work parties are? Holy crap! No one better bail on me or I will hunt you down.

I've been working like a dog getting this place ready! It does look way cool if I do say so myself. There will be lots of pics, so you all who are invited better dress up, because you will be plastered all over the internet one way or another.

The devil in the details.

Re-labeling my wine bottles. Yup, I get that detailed. My parties are serious business!

Decorations are coming together.

A sneak peek at my Halloween party decorations. I haven't even gotten started yet!

Necklace

Like my necklace? I love it! The colors are so pretty.

I don't know what to do about anything.

I can't work anymore today, I'm going home. I'm really sick of drama and chaos. I just want normal. For once in my life, I just want normal. No one wants to pay worth a damn right now. I'm hoping for one thing to come through, but I don't know. Maybe I'll just be Bohemian again and wait tables and live in apartment. What do you think? No? Up all night, sleep all day? I told you I was in a crappy mood.

You know what strikes me funny right now? The illusion of control. If you think you have control of ANYTHING, you are fooling yourself. You have free will, but no control. Trust me. Like when you are driving a car. You can exercise your free will to follow the rules of the road, go the speed limit, wear your seat belt, and you "feel" in control of the car. But you could get sideswiped. A meteor could fall on you. A deer could run out in front of you. Then you would lose control, because you NEVER HAD IT IN THE FIRST PLACE. That works with any scenario I can think of. You came to my blog today. You were in control of where you surfed the internet, right? Wrong. You used your free will to come here, a decision you made, but what if there was an EMP and all of a sudden no internet was available? What if I deleted my blog? No control. Just free will to make decisions based on availability and other factors. Why did you come to my blog today? (You are probably asking yourself that very question right now.) You have a weird free will, that's why.

Anyway, off of that rant.

I have decided that free will and decision making can suck sometimes. It would be nice right now to just have someone pointing me in the right direction. Petting my head and feeding me Bon-Bons. So much is at stake for me, and I'm just pooped out.

Don't take it personal.

I'm in a super crappy mood. I am mentally and physically exhausted. I don't want to do ANYTHING except sleep right now, and I can't. Sometimes I feel like crying because I'm so tired. Does that sound stupid? I'm tired of throwing up too. That shit needs to stop. If I am short with you today, don't take it personal.

Getting ready to party!

Feeling better this morning, thank God because I have a Halloween party to throw tomorrow night! AAHH!

Not well.

I've not been well today. I haven't kept anything down since after lunch. Must have eaten something bad. I've also been busier than a one-legged man in an ass kicking contest. Meeting with recruiters, phone interviews, and emails. I'm also trying to get my work project done while all this is going on. Just trying to keep it together. I'm tired. I'm so tired.