Amen Brother, Amen

I really like my doctor. After 4 denials, she called my insurance company today and kicked butt. She smiled when she handed me the approval number for my MRI. She took my hand and said, "We are gonna get you better". Apparently, I've lost 12 pounds in 2 weeks because I am in too much pain to eat. I called her office this morning in tears. I'm not a big cryer. Her nurse told me to be there in an hour. I came in hunched over with big puffy, red eyes. I didn't comb my hair or put makeup on. Too much effort. I got ZERO sleep last night from the blinding pain shooting up and down my leg, up through my back into my eyeballs and back down to my calves. I wanted to scream but it came out in short little bursts of pitiful grunts. Got more steroids and pain killers shot into my butt today, but I am pain-free this evening (relief!) and my MRI is scheduled for Wednesday morning, and I have an appointment with a spine specialist. Lots of happier people in my life now, especially K who put his sledgehammer back in his trunk, and I am dwelling on his last text "Now it's time to pray for best-case scenario results". Amen brother, amen.

My Sentiment Today

Spending Spree

Before I found out about the gazillion dollars I owe the IRS, I did a little shopping. I found these cool jeans and really pretty comforter at midnightvelvet.com, and I got new frames for my glasses. So now I look cool and sleep cozy while the US government gets to retire on my very painful payment. Because of the short sale on my home in Washington last year I was punched right in the gut. Thank God I knew it was coming and was prepared, it could have been heart-attack inducing! I'm not kidding. I could have paid cash outright for a new car with what I had to pay them! Arrrrrg.

Invasive Fish

So, I ran across this really interesting little webpage called Invasive Fish. Well, I didn't really "run across" it, I met the author. (A story for another time.) You should check it out for yourself, interesting stuff.  Fun pictures! You should visit. Go! Go now!

Now, some of you know that I like to fish, and that I have very fond memories of fishing with my dad. I was dragged all over as a kid camping, fishing, hiking, stuff like that, and because I was an only child, I paid attention, learned quickly and kept to myself. This gave me the edge. I remember all the old men on the docks were so impressed with how quiet and well behaved I was (not anything like I am now) and they would all clap or congratulate me when I made a good catch. I would get so excited watching the fish flop around. Other kids would get bored and cast out, reel in, cast out, reel in, and drive everyone crazy. I would just sit there patiently listening to my Walkman, finger on my line so that I could feel any little nibble. I gnawed on my beef jerky and would steal marshmallows from my dad's tackle box. Good times.  I haven't fished since my dad passed away in 2007, but I have reason to get my pole wet again now, so perhaps my dad will go with me in spirit.

Physical Therapy, a Walking Stick and Shots in the Butt

So I really jacked up my back good. Having a rough time getting better. It had been 6 days without getting better, so physical therapy was the next step. I've had back injuries before, but never has recovery taken this long with so much effort. Icing, heat, drugs, stretching, praying. I guess it's the getting old thang. Or maybe I'm stubborn and can't break from sitting too long at the keyboard with the pressure bearing down on my lower back. Either way my patience is running thin. K is in constant contact with me checking up on my progress. I told him I was worried it was taking me too many steps backwards and I'm scared of regressing. I told him I don't like being idle and that I missed training terribly. This was his reply, "Everything happens for a reason. It was a sign that your body needed some rest and was being pushed too hard. This rest will be good for you. Don't stress about it. We will get back at it soon and will go light and slowly push." You can tell by his response that he feels responsible for pushing me hard, even though I've told him that isn't so.

I'm trying to keep my mind occupied with writing, reading and talking/spending time with the newest addition to my life, which is good. I'm learning some things about myself. Work has been a little overwhelming lately, but I did complete a huge project which is a load off. I was able to relax tonight for the first time in a while enjoying some of the simpler things in life.

Got two shots in the butt a week ago, and two more today (ouch!), got x-rays taken and went to my first physical therapy session on Monday. PT went really well, I feel better already, but I am learning all new ways to move/walk and get up from sitting and prone positions. It's odd and will take some getting used to. The last 7 months of training has produced several large "knots" in my lumbar spine that are impinging on several different nerves, causing extreme pain. My PT doesn't suspect any disc damage (x-rays will verify that) but it will take 6 to 8 weeks of PT 3 times a week before I am fully healed. UG. I will most likely be back at training in a week or so but will be starting off slower and there will be more stretching before and after. I still get to hit and kick things, but with some caution. This injury will NOT WIN. It turns out several guys from my old gym are regulars at the PT facility, go figure! We all beat up our bodies, apparently, and get lazy in our movements. I use my lower back muscles WAY too much for everything, so now I will be using more of my abdominal muscles. Good times. I have MAJOR cabin fever so I'm going back to work to tomorrow, my first day without pain killers.  I have a walking stick just in case I feel myself losing balance.  We'll see how it goes.