Here fishy, fishy fishy.

Finally, the long Memorial Day weekend! I took Friday off to make it 4 days off and went fishing with my parents. Here is what happened.

My mom caught 2 trout, my dad caught 2 trout and everyone on the fricking dock caught fish EXCEPT ME. I got lots of bites, but none on the hook. DAMN IT.

I got stung on the NECK by a humming-bird-sized Bumble fucking Bee. I'm allergic to wasps, so thank God it wasn't a wasp, but STILL. Now you all know I am a complete spaz, so you can just imagine the dance I did when this monster kept dive-bombing me and landed on my neck. I broke my chair. At that point of no fish, a stung neck and a broken chair it was time to go home and regroup. Seriously. WTF?

This is the tacklebox I got when I was like 10 or something. I do know how to catch fish for anyone who might want to be a smartass commentor.

I put pictures of my mom & dad fishing on my flickr account, but I doubt I will be able to keep them there because I will be threatened with bodily harm. So, go look quick before I get beat up.

As for the rest of my weekend, we did nothing on Saturday, went to my parent's house for barbecued teriyaki chicken on Sunday (Yum!) and basked in the sun on the back porch on Monday. Not real exciting, but better than working. I'll be looking forward to reading all your guys' blogs, for I am sure you can top this.

Sometimes I get bored.

The brightest and prettiest rainbow I've ever seen. The picture doesn't do it justice. Where the hell is my pot o' gold? Hiding behind my hair on Monday Morning. Don't let the beast out.

Plays and Presents

It took me awhile to download the pictures from my camera, so you are getting some belated picture updates. The first picture is my stepson (left) with his friends on the night of his play "Aladdin". He was fabulous. The second picture is the presents my hubby and stepson got me for Mother's Day; some tulips (my favorite!), some chocolates and a basket with girl stuff in it. (Candles, wine, and bath stuff.) This is all you are getting right now because I have the need to go bake a chocolate cake. Buh-bye!

I've got a fever, and the prescription is, MORE COWBELL.

Just a little something for all you SNL fans out there. I saw that clip the other night and it just makes me giggle every time.

Here is what is going on in my life:

#1 I got my hair foiled! I'm very blonde again!

#2 I am a total LOST junkie, "4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42". We're about halfway through the second season where Shannon was just shot by Anna Lucia, a.k.a. Rambo girl. I am in love with Sawyer. Isn't everyone? Jack is too metro. Sayid is pretty hot too, actually. I have changed my mind about Jin, he is less of a dickwad now.

#3 I am trying out some dinners from "Month of Meals", they look really good, and surprisingly they are pretty inexpensive! I'm picking them up tonight.

#4 My mom is on the hunt for a new puppy! So fun!

#5 I did many squats/lunges/calf-raises on Monday and my legs have ceased to work. I say "OW" every other step when walking. My coworkers think this is funny.

#6 Apparently, I throw things in my sleep.

#7 I am having a much needed "girl's night" tomorrow night, but I thought it was last Thursday and showed up at my friend's house. Good thing she wasn't home. Who is retarded? That would be me.

Questions you were asking yourself 3 years ago.

1. WTF is that big thing in the jungle?
2. What on earth did she DO?
3. How the hell do that many people survive a plane crash?
4. Who the fuck is the guy in the suit who keeps appearing and then disappearing?
5. Why do I want to punch the ditzy blonde so badly?
6. Why does the cute guy who looks like Viggo Mortensen have such a 'tude?
7. Is the old guy just a bit off, or is it me?
8. Why was the dog hiding?
9. When is the Asian chick going to get all up in her husband's grill about being such a fucker?

YES, I am finally watching LOST. I love it! I can't believe I waited this long to see it. I have watched the first 4 episodes and going to watch more tonight. DO NOT RUIN IT FOR ME, if you tell me spoilers, I will hunt you down and let my dogs eat you.

What Cheryl Needs.

This is a funny Meme from Annie. What you do is google your name + "needs", then write down what comes up, so I did. Cheryl needs lots of things.

1. Cheryl needs to write some functions to figure out how that happened. (Um, what? Sure. I write functions all the time.)

2. Cheryl needs to stop sending me dirty emails. (Yeah, baby, I'm so bad!)

3. Cheryl needs to have an affair. (NO, Cheryl doesn't! Ha! She would get kicked in the twat for that one.)

4. Cheryl needs a good slap. (Yes, she certainly does. Probably for the dirty emails. LOL.)

My God.

This is terrible.

Greensburg, Kansas - F5 Tornado damage, aerial view.

Microwave Massacre

Yes, I actually rented this movie. I haven't watched it yet, but I'm betting that I will like it based on this blurb I found on badmovies.org:

Things I Learned From "Microwave Massacre":

1. Every movie should begin with drum music and a girl's breasts flopping around.
2. A three pound crab is pretty frightening.
3. Food shouldn't match your furniture.
4. Guys like girls with large breasts for their personality.
5. If you don't like what's for dinner, get a mouthful of water and spit it into the food.
6. Girls: Your marriage is in trouble if the hubby throws a fit then urinates in the living room.
7. People stay fresh longer in aluminum foil.
8. Two things not to say when picking up a girl: "You're not used to being on your feet." and "You look a lot better in the dark."
9. Everyone keeps a hatchet in the kitchen.
10. Never dress like a chicken around cannibals.
11. Doctors use syringes as darts.
12. Vibrators make good gardening tools. (You heard me right, and there is no way in Hell I'm explaining.)

ROFLMAO!

Hangin' with my Peeps.

I crack myself up.