Tuesday, June 04, 2013

I never thought I could be so happy...even with back surgery pending

I am dealing with some pretty heavy stuff that normally would tip me right over the edge...but...I feel incredibly blessed.  My life has taken many hard turns over the years and lessons-a-plenty I have learned.  All those things that happened that I thought were bad, though, turned out to be blessings in disguise and fatefully took me to the place I'm at now.  I wouldn't do anything different.  I wouldn't be the person I am today if I had gone down a different road.

My mom was diagnosed with a terminal illness almost a year ago, and I am laid up with a herniated disc in my back that is excruciatingly painful, but because of these things, an incredible bond and friendship with my mom has developed that is more deep and loving than I could have ever imagined!  I have been forced to stay at home and learn what is important in life, and well, I have had to deal with myself!  You can't run from your thoughts when you are down for the count. These are precious days.

Since I moved to California 3 years ago, I have had the time of my life!  I live in a beautiful paid-for house with a pool, I've become even closer with my step son and have watched him grow up and get through college (he is graduating next weekend!), I get to go to Disneyland all the time, I've started traveling more, I make a ton a money and don't even really have to work anymore if I don't want to, I have a great job that let's me work from home to take care of my mom, I've met some incredible people who have turned into irreplaceable friends, I found a hobby I love (boxing) with the best trainer EVER (Krzysztof), I gained a second mom in my mom's best friend Cathy (my Godmother), and last February I met a really great (and hot!) guy with a huge heart (Dale) that I love spending time with - just when I was convinced there were no decent single guys left on the earth!  I know that even when my mom passes and I become the last standing in my family, I will have an awesome non-blood family that I adore and that I know will be there for me.  I also get to see my best friend in the whole world all the time even though she lives in Seattle because we make sure to talk every day and visit each other as often as possible.

So, even with the challenges ahead of me, I am truly grateful for my life.  I never knew happiness the way I know it now; I have peace and love in my life, and I give all the thanks to God who told me everything was going to work out - I just never really believed Him.

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