Thursday, October 28, 2010
I was supposed to go out tonight with my friends and instead I came back to the hotel because I can't breathe. Literally. I just crawled into bed and stared into space. I am systematically losing everything; including my mind.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
I just got home from work. I got into an argument with my boss (not good) and if my house was already sold I probably would have walked. I'm so tired of everyone's shit. I am good at what I do and I'm sorry, I'm too old old to kiss anyone's ass or be condescended to. One of my "boys" overheard the argument and went out of his way to tell me I was the best boss he has ever had and "wasn't just saying that". So I guess if I get fired for not backing down, at least I know someone appreciates my demand for quality.
Monday, October 18, 2010
After all the deaths in my family and my divorce, the doctor had me on all kinds of pills. Anxiety pills, depression pills, you name it. I HATE pills. About a month ago, I chucked them all into the garbage. Quit cold turkey. I guess they were keeping the beast within at bay; that numb feeling, because it is unleashed now and HOLY CHRIST I am like a walking porno.
Sunday, October 17, 2010
I have a ton of pics to share but I haven't been home to download them!
Friday, October 15, 2010
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
1. Find a way to sell my house because then I would actually have money.
2. Get my Cali driver's license. The last appointment I had I missed because I circled the parking lot for an hour trying to get a parking space.
3. Find out why my shoulders hurt and get then fixed so I can join the local boxing club and make them hurt again.
4. Find a way to get my backlog caught up at work without killing myself so everyone will shut the fuck up and I can have a life.
5. Go to tbe dentist.
6. Give the pups a bath. Stinky little fuzzbutts.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Saturday, October 09, 2010
Friday, October 08, 2010
Thursday, October 07, 2010
The new guy I've been talking to asked me out for coffee so we will see how that goes. OMG this blog is turning into the Jerry Fucking Springer show.
Wednesday, October 06, 2010
It has been pouring here the last few days. Feels like home! LOL. I miss my nightly swims though - a little too chilly. I miss my ma too. She is coming back Saturday! She keeps me laughing and makes me go outside. Hehe. I tend to isolate when alone.
Monday, October 04, 2010
Sunday, October 03, 2010
I am a little old fashioned and believe the man should pursue the woman, but since I am new to dating (haven't since, oh, 1992 or so), I want to know if men still prefer that. I would NEVER ask a guy out, but with online dating, do you think it is a turn off for a woman to "wink" first, or should I wait for the wink? Just curious. I've always been told that if a guy (a real man) is interested he will make the first move and doesn't want the woman to - likes a little challenge. I have no clue. I can't change who I am, but wondering if a little flirting first is OK. I am looking for a quality guy, not some pretty boy idiot.
Saturday, October 02, 2010
I'm in love with Ideal Protein Products, they are YUMMY - I got sick of Bistro MD and it became too expensive. I did lose 50 pounds, but what I'm doing now is working really well and I love what it is doing to my body (getting everything right on the inside). It is reasonable because you do your own dinners and sauces/spices. (Walden Farms for those!) Since I like to cook and like fresh food it works better for me. I will also be off ALL my medications within 3 months or so. Yay! It's a bitch at first, though. My body is so completely messed up. Once I am out of detox (phase 1) I will start on P90X. I can't workout that hard with limited carbs - so for now I am walking, swimming and doing some weights - but not to the point of muscle failure. I'm thinking my dating life will improve with a kickass body. Men are all about the visual. LOL First thing I'm going to do when I reach my goal is buy myself a sexy evening dress from Chico's and go OUT. I am also going to post a pic of me in a bikini that day. Oh YES I will! I have a GREAT support team right now that is rooting for me every step of the way. I have made good strides - now for the home stretch!
Its been a rough couple of days detoxing. I am not eating sugar, bread, pasta or any dairy for a time. I am on a doctor's program to get the last of the weight off and get completely healthy. It comes with a price. A monster headache for starters. It will get easier and I will feel great in a month or so. I need to get my hormones in balance, my insulin regulated and all the poison food out of my system.