Tuesday, August 10, 2010

I want to be a beach bum.

I'm in a bad mood today. Some days I just want to quit my job and be a beach bum or something. Work invades everything. How did this happen? I climb the corporate ladder, become moderately successful and now all I do is work. I can't even take a four-day weekend. I never intended to be a workaholic. Not at all. In fact, I think there is so much more to life. Right now, you could say things are going well for me, but I'm lacking what I want most. My soul kind of aches. I try to motivate myself, but I end up caring less and less. Every time I try to care about someone, everything goes nuclear on me. I'm not alone on this. I talked to a woman in a store the other day, for quite a while actually. She is 45 and in the same boat I'm in, as well as all her friends. She is drop-dead gorgeous, and she said there is just crap out there for men. Her friends say the same thing. One of her friends is a model and no longer dates at all. Not a good prognosis. I thought I found someone once a few years ago, a very special person, but, mushroom cloud. That is why I decided maybe I ought to just focus my attention elsewhere for a while. I feel burnt out, though.

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