Monday, April 28, 2008

Locking Gas Caps

First, I just got a locking gas cap and HATE. IT. and it hates me back. I was thinking that with gas prices rising out of control to $4 a gallon that it would be a smart move. It would have been smart if I wasn't as impatient as a spider monkey on crack. Jim gave me two keys: one for his truck, one for mine. They look identical. Do we mark them, so we know which one is which? Of course not. Also, I let my vehicle run down to fumes before I stop and get gas. I can't help it.

OK, so here I am coasting into the nearest gas station. I try to take the cap off as though it didn't lock. Oh, duh! Okay, go get keys. Put wrong key in twice. Put right key in. Do a half turn JUST LIKE IT SAYS. Pull. Nothing. Pull again. Nothing. I start to panic. Look at directions on cap again. Half turn, pull. MOTHER OF HELL! Start jumping around in frustration hitting and kicking vehicle. People start to stare. I am almost in tears. Grip cap/key with my life and pick one leg up and plant it next to the cap for leverage. Crank a half turn and pull with all of my might. COME ON DAMNIT! Walk around in a circle thinking. Go back to cap and do a half turn with the key again, grip the cap and turn a little more. OPEN! HOORAY! It only took 20 minutes. I seriously need someone to follow me around all day and just help me with stuff. You know?

Second, my mom called me from California and needed me to go get into one her "lock boxes" and send her something from inside it. OK, no problem. While looking through the box I found all kinds of fun stuff and got majorly distracted. I know, shocker. She had piles and piles of negatives in there. Fun! I start looking at all of them. OMG. Pictures I've never seen before. of ME. I found some particular bikini ones that just freaked me out. Did I EVER look like that? Holy crap! My favorite bikini, too! I remember it! No wonder I'm depressed. I sat and reminisced for a while and then took them home to print. (Don't worry, I'll put them back.) I am SO going to put this one on the frig. Okay, maybe I'll never look like that again, but the fact that I ever did gives me some extra motivation. I had ABS. ABS! Now, never mind the hair. Just don't look directly at it. Oh, and YES, it was necessary to put on earrings and makeup and hairspray to go the beach. That's how we got picked up to go waterskiing. Duh. Also, yes, my mom has redecorated since then. Thank GOD.

6 comments:

  1. Holy 80's! j/k you look great in the bikini.

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  2. LOL Brianna - I know, my hair was out of control into the 90's, even. I don't own a bottle of hairspray now - and I certainly can't see my abs. OH WELL. Such is life. I always say if you are going to dream, DREAM BIG.

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  3. look at you, you little hottie! you look great! you can do anything you set your mind to!

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  4. I never ever had abs. never.

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  5. Anonymous5:32 AM

    Don't post pictures like that! Who knows, there might be some single guy out there looking. You're a married woman, and you don't want to give ANYBODY (besides Jim) the idea that you're the sexiest pin-up girl in the whole world. If you keep it up, some teenager is going to enlarge the picture to poster size, and tack it to his bedroom wall. (On second thought, you can post some more pictures like that, if you really want. How many more do you have? Wanna sell them?)

    - KS

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  6. OMG I just snorted my mocha through my nose, KS! You are so awesome. I think you'd be the only one buying them, but I'm gonna post more just to get comments like that!

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