Saturday, January 14, 2006

I've still got it!

OK, so I was doing a little grocery shopping yesterday after work and apparently when you aren't wearing a wedding ring and you use a grocery basket to shop instead of a cart, men think you are available. Now, before you think I'm a big whore, the whole not-wearing-the-ring-thing is not intentional, I just forget to put it back on in the morning, and sometimes I'm too bloated because being a woman can suck. You also have to realize that I live in a small town, and everyone is friendly and talkative. Not a whore!

So, I was meandering up and down the aisles and this guy was kind of following me. I stopped in the frozen section and picked up a lasagna. The guy asked if those were "any good" and I looked up and said, "Yeah, they are, they're really good". He struck up a conversation with me about stupid random shit. I didn't think much of it, he just seemed friendly. I'm also not so good-looking that I automatically assume a man is hitting on me just because he is talking to me. It was the end of the day, too, and I looked like a trainwreck per usual.

I continued shopping and he went the other way. A few minutes later, we ran into each other in the Mexican food aisle. He looked up and smiled at me and said, "Hello again!". I said "Hi" and chuckled like anyone would do. I picked up the all-fat refried beans. This must have been the selling point because it was then that he apologized for being so forward and asked me out. This is where it gets funny. I'm sure I looked like one of those cartoon characters where their jaw drops to the floor and said something really intelligent like, "Huh?" Yeah, that's what I said. I was in a little bit of shock, you see. Sometime between him telling me that I was beautiful (which really threw me off) and telling me that he was a newly retired Navy guy, I managed to blurt out that I was married. He said "darn" and other stuff I don't remember due to the fact that my brain was fogged in, and I was still trying to figure out what the hell just happened.

I'm not sure how long I held the refried beans in my hand, but my ego was totally doing back flips. When I got to the checkout counter, I told the girl that I just got hit on. I told her what happened talking a mile a minute I'm sure and said I couldn't wait to go home and tell my husband! (Yes, I am freak loser who told this to the check-out girl.) She laughed and said that her husband would kick her ass if that happened to her. I retorted with, "Yeah, because YOU are cute and young and perky, I am old and fat and married, and am going to tell the whole world on the internet."

Jim wasn't all that thrilled, though, which made me giddy. I can't help it.

3 comments:

  1. You got it You got it :doing the cabbage patch: You got it!!!! LOL

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  2. Anonymous5:51 PM

    Sweet! So I bet the hubby makes sure you head out of the house with your wedding ring from now on, eh?

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  3. At least the guy didn't continue to try to ask you out even after he knew you were married. I had one charmer decide to ask me out when I was trying to get out of a parking lot (he was a security guard near the gate) ... I told him I was married and he said back to me "Happily?" ... as if that was his creative "In" to get me to say "Oh yes, I'll definitely go out with you now" point. Freak! LOL

    *Hugs*

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