I've been absent because...
Maggie's ass exploded, and I fell off a ladder and smashed my head on the coffee table. No shit, people.
Last week, my poor little Magadog was sliding her butt on the floor, so I knew it was time to express the anal glands. (ewwww.) So, I picked her up and went to do just that. What I didn't know was that she had an infection and when I went to squeeze her ass, it burst. In the wrong spot. I was totally freaked and started yelling and crying - and Jim started yelling "What did you do to the DOG?" There was blood and panicking by the humans and an actual look of relief on Maggie's face. After a nice trip to the vet with penicillan shots, antibiotics and a trendy little cone for Maggie's head, I finally relaxed. I felt really guilty, though, even after the vet assured me that I was just trying to help her. I have convinced myself that I am the worst dogmama EVER. My name is now badawfulevildogmama. I did receive my punishment, however.
After much warning from my husband to stay off of the ladder due to my extreme clumsiness and lack of balance - I did it anyway. and fell backward and smacked my head on the coffee table. Ow. It hurt like a motherfucker, I'm going to live, and that is all I have to say about that. I do have some cute pictures of Maggie in her cone (I call her funnel-face.) - I will post those soon.